I may look calm, but in my head I've killed you three times.

You know what I wish I could do?

I wish I could…strip myself of my entire skin until I’m raw and bleeding.

I wish I could start fresh, without being worn and battered.

I know battle scars toughen you up, and you come out of things stronger but

what I want right now is to be new to everything again.

At least I won’t be feeling what I’m feeling right now.

And sometimes everything stretches so thin I literally find myself 

on the floor crying and crying and crying without knowing when I’ll allow myself to stop.